Time of the Season
by Latona Enelra Caine
Summary: A collection of Lizzington drabbles that follow the lives of Red and Lizzie as they are thrown into a variety of situations. Birth...Death...Intimate wars...what more could one ask for?
1. Hello

**_Father and Son by Daft Punk_  
**

* * *

**1\. Hello**

He's not the same man he was four years ago. Wrinkles have creased the sides of his eyes. The bags under them are more pronounced than ever. He's thinner. It hurts his knees to stand sometimes. The astute Red Reddington is naught but an old man now.

Sitting in the warm sun on the terrace of his French villa helps the pain. But it doesn't fill the hole in his heart that's torn open since her death. The one chance he had at redemption; gone because of one miscalculation on his part.

He prefers to be alone these days. It's better that way, for him, and for everyone else. Everywhere he goes, death follows. Her absence is evidence of that. His wife and daughters deaths prove the point even further.

Roses no longer smell sweet. Whiskey doesn't burn memories away. The wine doesn't chase the smell of her perfume away. Where once the ocean and the horizon held a refuge for him on a sail boat all alone...in the center of the world, there is now a deep void. The glittering stars no longer shed some hopes of light amongst the darkness out in the country away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Books no longer hold good company for him. Not without her there to laugh over some amusing line he's read to her.

God he misses her. He misses the feel of her smooth, slender hand against his own large one. Her soft lips against his. Her lavender scented hair. The feel of her body molded against his own first thing in the morning.

He wakes up each morning pressing his chest against softness. When he realizes that it's not her body that he's holding against him, but rather a pillow, he feels his heart shatter. At night he roars at the moon, cursing whatever cruel God lays above it. He just wants it all to end.

He'd been close to achieving a little grace when she had told him they were expecting a little boy. Joy had consumed every fiber of his being that day.

Now he wallows in bitterness. This is the new Raymond Reddington. Red Reddington, The Concierge of Crime is no more. Now in his place, there is only Raymond the Carless. Red Reddington the Ghost.

He doesn't notice the absence of singing birds that morning. Nor the movement amongst the willow trees out in the garden of the villa.

He simply sits on the chair in front of his breakfast, donning his pale straw fedora, the one she liked seeing him in, and his glasses, unflinching and unmoving, waiting like he has each day for the past four years. What he's yearned so desperately for.

The crack of the gun resonates across the land escaping into the hills beside the estate. It takes him a moment to realize that it's finally happened. Red stains his beige waist coat and white shirt. A smile tugs at his lips.

"Hello, Lizzie." He whispers.

* * *

**A/N: Let me know what you think!**


	2. Peppermint

**A/N: Another one to dry your tears from the other one...**

_**T**__**his Time by Jonathan Rhys Meyers**_

* * *

**2\. Peppermint**

Her voice stops his movements as it cuts across the room like a knife. "Don't even think about it."

"What?" He says innocently.

"I'm not blind!" She glares at him as she snatches her purse away from him. "You've been wolfing down my Icebreakers for the past hour! I only had like ten left and I'm pretty sure I saw you sneak your hand in here nine times!"

"Your perception impresses me."

She continues ignoring his diversion. "So, if I'm right-which I know I am- you've only left one for me!" She digs the blue circular tin out of her purse and pops it open. Upon seeing the lone mint inside she slowly meets his amused gaze with narrowed eyes.

"Bastard." She mutters darkly.

"Now, Lizzie!" He starts in a jovial tone. "There's no need for such harsh words! I'm offended!" He laughs. "You can apologize by giving me that one too! Here, I'll help myself-Ow!"

He flinches when she slaps his hand away from the tin.

"Go to hell. It's mine."

"Now hold on just a sec-"

"Nope!" She pops the mint into her mouth just as he's about to reach for the mint once more leaving him grasping at air.

"-you owe me..." He trails off watching as she smirks at him, obviously pleased at having gained the upper hand.

He narrows his eyes at her. "Now that was not nice at all Lizzie."

She shrugs making pouted sucking sounds as she talks. "All's fair in love and war, Red." She says in a matter-of-fact tone.

He quirks his eyebrows. "Really? And you call this a war?"

"Uh-_yeah_! Icebreaker war!"

He throws his head back and laughs loudly. "Oh, Lizzie, your dorky side amuses me sometimes!"

She rolls her eyes at him.

"And what makes you think you've won this battle?"

She shoots him an incredulous expression. "Who got the mint?"

She squeaks in surprise when he covers her lips with his own. Slowly, he runs his hands across her back, easing her across the couch. He pushes his tongue against her lips and she readily allows him inside. The mint makes his lips and tongue tingle with the sharp, refreshing taste that the it's left there...and low and behold, when he runs his tongue over hers, he finds that he's caught the goods, amongst other things. She moans breathlessly as he gently pulls away from her.

"God, that was fabulous, Lizzie." He proudly bares his teeth at her with the tiny mint sitting between his teeth.

Her eyes flutter open and scrutinize his insolent taunt.

"And I must say that the sunlight does wonders for your gorgeous complexion and those beautiful eyes." He murmurs against her cheek while tucking wisps of her dark hair behind her ear.

"Flattery will get you nowhere."

He chuckles softly. "Now, I've a simple question for you..."

"No."

"Ah, ah, ahh," he hushes her pressing a finger to her lips. "Who got the mint?"

She glares at him.

"Who?"

Silence.

"Lizzie?"

"You did," She bites out.

She pushes him off and stalks away. "It's not over Raymond!


	3. Cold Coffee

**_Holdin On by Citizen Cope _**

* * *

**3\. Cold Coffee**

The yellow light forcing its way through her shut eyelids made her groan slightly.

"Mmm," he hummed into her ear. "Good morning, love."

She smiled widely as he wrapped his arms tightly around her waist, drawing her back closer against his chest.

"Hi," she mumbled as she languidly stretched against his body.

The sunlight cheerfully filtered through the open French doors casting a warm glow against the white curtains and pale bed sheets.

She slid her cold legs between his warm ones running her hand down his side towards his muscular toned thigh. Red huffed a laugh at the ticklish sensations.

He pressed a kiss against her bare shoulder. "I don't want to get up." He groaned.

She sighed in agreement. Days like this, where the nuisances of the world could not catch up to them made her feel as if nothing would ever touch them.

"I'll start the coffee." She said but made no move to get up.

He groaned in protest. "Come now, Lizzie," he murmured against her ear and ran a hand near the waistline of her boy shorts. She giggled at his touch.

"Surely, you'd prefer to stay in bed doing much more fun things that brewing some bitter coffee?" He drawled pressing his cheek against hers.

"Oh really, and what fun things do you have in mind?" She turned in his arms and grinned widely at him.

"Er...let me consider that for a moment." He said gazing up towards the headboard of the four poster in feigned contemplation. "How about...we play a game?"

She quirked her eyebrow at him. "What game?" She asked suspiciously.

"It's called, 'Stay in bed and make mind blowing love to Lizzie'."

"Haha!" She laughed mockingly. "No."

"Are you _quite_ sure sweetheart? It's fun."

"Quite sure, but thanks for the offer!" She said as she began to sit up but stopped when he pinned her arm down.

He grinned at her mischievously and rested his head on his hand. "A _chocolate_ mint says that I can change your mind."

She gave him a challenging gaze.

"Game on!"

Reds face went blank and he stared at her for several moments making her feel unsettled. He gave her a wicked grin and grabbed her hands pinning them on either side of her head trapping her body between his own.

"Let's have a repeat of the last Icebreaker war shall we," He whispered.

* * *

**A/N: As always, thanks to my beta, JackandSam for her input! Love ya gurl! ****Would love to know what you all think so far!**


	4. Healing

**_Bloodstream by Stateless_  
**

**_You've gotten into my bloodstream  
I can feel you flowing in me_**

* * *

**4\. Healing**

She feels slightly unsettled when Red tells Dembe to take the night off and go to his room down the hall. At first she doesn't know whether to protest or demand that he call her a cab. However, the aspirin he offers her and the warm towels and wine he calls for are too tempting.

"Sit down," he demands in a gentle tone.

She eyes him warily before relenting and sitting at the edge of the luxurious sofa in the middle of the living room. He sits on the coffee table in front of her and lays a first aid kit beside him. Carefully he grabs her shin tilting it to the side and inspects her mouth with a slight frown.

"What did he hit you with?" He asks as his eyebrows furrow.

"He punched me," She mutters, averting her gaze from his piercing green eyes.

Without another word he takes a small envelope from the kit and tears it open. The strong smell of alcohol hits her nose as he pulls a wipe out. She flinches in pain when he begins dabbing at the corner of her lips and he immediately stops. A look of worry flits across his eyes.

"Sorry..."

Elizabeth watches him for a long moment. She can't tell whether he's apologizing for her lip or for the whole situation in general. He's never shown any regrets for anything that he's ever done. And she can't for the life of her figure out why he regrets anything now of all days.

He dabs at her lip again but this time he presses his large smooth palm against her cheek to hold her steady. She can feel the heat rise on her skin where she's touching her and she desperately wants to lean into his hand for all the safety and warmth that she feels with him.

She hasn't felt either of those things since finding Zamani in her house. Not since finding the passports under the floorboards. She doesn't know her husband anymore. Did she ever? But why does she feel that she knows Red better than she ever knew Tom? She doesn't want to admit it, but it's the truth.

"Are you alright?" He whispers when she begins to close her eyes.

She nods. "Yeah…just a bit tired."

He nods in reply watching her with his half lidded gaze. Slowly he begins to caress her cheek with his thumb leaving the trail he leaves behind tingling with warmth. She leans further into his hand and he leans towards her holding her face so close to his that she can feel the warm air flowing from his nostrils.

"Lizzie?" He murmurs.

For a moment she wonders what he's asking. Then she realizes that he's asking for permission. He's leaving the final decision up to her. Giving her control over the situation before things escalate further. With a jerk of her head she nods before closing the distance between them and pressing her lips against his.

* * *

**A/N: You guys are all amazing! Thank you for your continued support, it makes me want to write more! Hopefully this makes up for making some of you cry :D**


	5. Choice

**_Come Talk to Me by Bon Iver_  
**

_**Whatever fear invents I swear it makes no sense**_

_**I reach out to the bordered fence, Come down, come talk to me**_

* * *

**5\. Choice **

His words made her body flush with heat. She halfheartedly tried to think of something, anything that would make this stop. By the time he ran his hand under her shirt across her hip bones she'd decided that she no longer cared. She just wants to know what it's like to feel something real and honest.

She tried to suppress her moans of pleasure that were escaping from her mouth into his, but his damn hands were wandering to places that made her feel lightheaded and weak. Even if she _wanted _to stop she wouldn't be able to. She needed more of him.

She didn't stop him when he leaned back and lifted her off of the sofa and began heading towards his bedroom, his mouth never leaving hers. She didn't protest when he set her down on the massive four poster in the middle of the room. She didn't even try to push him away when he draped himself over her and began lavishing her body with gentle kisses to her throat.

She struggled to slip her hands between their bodies and deftly began to feel her way up his chest, unfastening the buttons of his fitted vest as she did so. He briefly pulled back to shrug it off before continuing to make her way down her throat. She was just about to start on his dress shirt when he suddenly pulled back with a slight gasp.

"Raymond-" his name slipped from her mouth as if they had always been so familiar with each other.

"Shh-" he whispered as he pressed a finger over her lips. "It just occurred to me that you might want to clean yourself up after your eventful night..."

Liz frowned at his words before remembering the tumble she'd had in the forest. She met Red's eyes tiredly and nodded.

He gave her his teasing smile. "I'll run you a bath!" And with that he pecked her once more on the lips and then rolled off of her and sauntered towards the bathroom.

* * *

**A/N: So...how was it? :D**


	6. Angry

**Sail by Awolnation **

* * *

**6\. Angry**

Inside he can feel a mixture of ire and fear grow in him. The fact that he has to rely on these trigger happy agents to get her back sets him on edge.

Of course, he _does_ have full control over the situation. But it was their stupid mistakes that got Lizzie kidnapped in the first place. And for that he is very afraid. He won't admit that to them, won't even admit it to himself. But the thought of her ending up as stew just like the rest of this psychopath's victims fills him with dread.

_"I believe I'll do everything I can to protect you and keep you alive..."  
_  
It's true. He will do anything to keep her alive. Which is why he decides that taking another little solitary field trip away from the F.B.I will do him some good.


	7. Midnight

**Birdcage Religion by Sleeping at Last**

* * *

**7\. Midnight**

His heart skipped a beat before his mind caught up with his senses. Her lips were soft as silk as he pressed his own against hers. He captured her top lip between his own and flicked his tongue out to taste it gently nipping at it. A soft moan escaped her completely overwhelming him as he groaned with need. He pressed his mouth more firmly against hers trying to throw weeks of pent up emotion into the kiss.

She grabbed at his vest lapels almost as if to push him away. But he wrapped his hands on her slender hips pushing her closer against him. She moaned in frustration before throwing her arms around his neck biting down hard on his tongue and pushing her own into his mouth which he greedily encaged . He could feel her stifled breaths in his mouth as she pressed firmly against him.

God she tasted just like he imagined she would. She wanted to take full control; he could tell by the way she was pulling against him in a way that almost felt like she still wanted to push him away. But he wasn't going to have any of that. Not yet. He opened his eyes and drowsily gazed at her closed ones. He stood from the coffee table and pushed her against the sofa with one swift, gentle movement. She easily fell against the cushions as he carefully laid across her body.

Her shallow breathing reached his ears and he let his head press against her chest where her heart was. He could hear it thumping erratically beneath the layers of clothing on her. Was this how her heart was beating when she was with Stanley? Was she feeling this much panic before he had reached her? He groaned as he pulled back up and buried his fingers in her hair. He pressed his nose in the crook of her neck and breathed in her sweet scent.

"Lizzie," he groaned against her skin.

"Red, we shouldn't-" her voice caught in her throat as he ran his tongue over her earlobe and she dug her fingers against his vest.

"Oh," he said in a low voice and pressed his lips against hers again. He gazed into her eyes with their mouths still connected. "I think we should." He murmured against her lips.

"Me too," She breathed before crushing her lips against his.


	8. Moment

**Delicate by Damien Rice**

* * *

**8\. Moment**

Red felt slightly ridiculous turning his back while Lizzie removed her clothes after the heated and passionate kiss they had just shared. However he did not want to push anything that she wasn't prepared for yet. So being the gentleman that he was he kept his back turned until she had stepped into the tub. When he finally heard the hesitant step she took into the water and had waited several seconds to assure himself that she was in fact slightly decent he turned around and sat on the stool beside the tub.

She looked flustered sitting there naked next to him. Red couldn't see anything provocative of course, due to the exuberant amount of bubble bath he'd poured into the hot water. He didn't think she appeared vulnerable in any way. Quite the contrary, she seemed to put up her steely demeanor a bit more. But he couldn't help but think that she looked beautiful sitting there before him bare shoulders and all.

She shifted her body making the water slosh around in the edges of the white porcelain tub. The steam rose around in small swirls around her tired face. She gazed at him with heavy eyelids.

"Is the water warm enough?" he asked with concern.

"Yes it is," she mumbled.

He reached out and took her had in his rubbing small circles on it with his thumb.

"I realize that we've jumped the gun before making our...feelings known." he said with amused eyes.

Liz cocked an eyebrow at this. "I think that nearly having sex on your living room couch goes slightly higher than just 'jumping the gun'."

Red laughed loudly. "Oh Lizzie, you do have a way with words." He smiled at her before raising his hand back up to caress her face as a thoughtful look overcame him

"I shudder to think what he would have done to your precious face had I gotten there later."

Liz shut her eyes and turned away from him. "He probably would have gone ahead with it." she said darkly. Red could see her frame tremble slightly.

"Elizabeth," he said grasping her arm. "Please look at me."

She did.

"I promise you. I'll never let anyone hurt you that way. Ever. I'll die before I let that happen." Red said earnestly. "This isn't just some game to me. I want you to know that. This is real..."

Liz watched him as his green eyes bored into hers.

"I do care for you, Lizzie. So very much."

She nodded silently and reached out to take his hand in hers.


	9. Vulnerable

**A/N: I totally wanted this to happen in the Stewmaker...**

**Letters From the Sky by Civil Twilight**

* * *

**9\. Vulnerable**

He finds her on his own in less than two hours. Naturally he calls the boys with the guns to help get her out.

"There she is," Ressler breaths as they catch sight of Lizzie stumbling towards them looking worse for wear. The blanket the paramedics carelessly threw on her hangs limply over her slender body. Her hair is a tangled mess and there's blood drying on her face.

Red feels his heart clench tightly. He meets her half way down the sloping hill.

"What did he do to you?" He immediately asks as he takes her arms leaving the other agent to make himself useful elsewhere.

Elizabeth shakes her head. "Beat me around a bit. Not much," she replies in a wavering voice which she tries to keep neutral.

Red touches the blood at the corner of her lips and she flinches away. His eye twitches.

"He hurt you," he mutters darkly. Out of the corner of his eyes he can see the paramedics pushing a gurney over the dead leaves. "That's him no doubt."

They both watch in silence as the body and paramedic disappear behind some trees. A surge of anger rushes through him at the sight. Red glances over Elizabeth's shoulder towards Ressler who is busy talking to some other agents barking orders at them. Seeing his chance he leads Elizabeth away from them towards Dembe and the car.

"Where are we going?" Elizabeth shoots him a puzzled look.

"For once, Lizzie just go with it. You'll find that not all of my escapades are as terrible as they seem."

"You ended up in hand cuffs the last two times," Elizabeth retorts.

He swings the car door open for her. "Touché."

With a withering look she glances towards Ressler one last time before reluctantly getting in.


	10. Birth

**A/N: Could not have done this one without you JackandSam! You're fantastic!**

**A/N: Guys! Check out the song! It's beautiful!**

_**Martin David by Matteo Zingales**_

* * *

**10\. Birth**

"I have never hated a man as much as I hate you, Raymond Reddington!" Lizzie shouted at the top of her lungs.

Red huffed a quiet laugh and kissed her sweaty brow. He winced slightly as she glared at him and crushed his hand in hers while she gritted her teeth in pain. He's sure that by the end of all of this, he'll have permanent damage to the poor hand.

Her breath came out in short gasps as her nostrils flared.

"Hate me all you want sweetheart." He held her head against his own and grinned at the narrowed eyes she flashed at him. "You're doing great, Lizzie, he's almost here."

"Mrs. Reddington, I need you to give one more big push," The masked doctor in light blue scrubs said from beside her perched legs.

"Red," She gasped as fear crept into her eyes.

"What's the matter?"

"Red, I'm scared. What if I'm not good at this? What if I end up being a terrible moth-"

"You're going to be fantastic, Lizzie," he whispered reassuringly. "Don't you worry about a thing sweetheart. We're in this together…I'll be here every step of the way. You're going to be an excellent mother, and our little boy is going to adore you…just like I do…." He gave her a wide grin that made his handsome face look boyish.

She nodded, breathing heavily and groaning in pain. "Promise me…" She panted. "Promise me that everything will be all right, Raymond," she said as tears escaped her eyes.

"Lizzie…everything will be all right…" He gently pressed his lips against hers and whispered against them. "You're going to be alright."

"Mrs. Reddington, push on the count of ten."

"Are you ready Lizzie?" He asked.

She searched his eyes in wonderment, considering his words for a brief moment before an onslaught of contractions hit her and a scream escaped her lips.

"One, two, three, four…"

"Deep breaths Lizzie, in out…nearly there…."

"Push!"

Lizzie gritted her teeth and cried out as she clutched his hand tightly.

"Come on, sweetheart. Nearly there."

She gasped after one final push and sagged against his chest as he pressed his face in her hair and hummed in satisfaction.

"I'm so proud of you, Lizzie," he whispered in her ear.

A beautiful cry filled the room as the doctor and nurses happily talked amongst themselves.

"Red!" She gasped as she limply raised her hand behind her head and ran her hand down his head. "He's here," she said quietly.

He kissed her cheek softly and whispered against her skin, "I know Lizzie, can you hear him?"

Red peered over towards the crowd of nurses that were seeing to his son, trying to catch a glimpse of him.

"Thank you for this, Lizzie…you've made me the happiest man on earth."

He kissed her lips softly, then pulled back and smiled at her.

A nurse approached them and placed a small bundle with dark brown hair into her arms.

"He's beautiful," Lizzie said softly.

"Hello, Samuel Ray Reddington," Red whispered lovingly.


	11. Never Tear Us Apart

**A/N: Leave your thoughts! They feed my brain and soul!**

_**Knocked Up by Kings of Leon **_

* * *

**11\. Never Tear us Apart**

"You need to run-"

"-No-"

"Listen to me Lizzie," he groaned and threw his head back as he coughed out mouth full of blood threatening to choke him. "Listen to me...you need to run..." He wheezed. "They'll be here in a matter of time."

"No, please!"

"And when they get here," Red continued, "They will not hesitate to to capture you and torture you for day's, weeks if need be."

Liz sobbed desperately. "I can't just leave you here!"

"You must!" He snarled. "Do you love me?" He whispered in a softer tone.

"Yes...yes, yes, yes, Red, I love you. I need you to stay." She said it so quietly that he had to strain his ears over his wheezing breaths.

He raised his hand up towards her face and ran his fingers down her cheek.

"If you love me..." He coughed again, desperately gasping for air. More blood pooled out of his mouth. "Lizzie...if you love me...you'll do this one thing for me."

She shook her head angrily. "No! I'm not! I won't just leave you here! I can't-"

"-Yes you can!" He raised his voice angrily. "Yes you can. Lizzie, you're strong...you're so strong and you don't need anything or anyone to help you move forward. Not me-not anyone. You need to go. For my sake. If not, I died for nothing. My job was to protect you. If you live...then my work is done. If you live...then my life meant something. I love you more than anything...one day years from now-," he groaned as a sharp pain ran down his side.

Liz clutched his hand and ran her hand down the side of his head, stopping just below his sideburn.

"One day..." he continued through gritted teeth trembling, "Years from now...you'll be with a man far worthier of you than I am. You'll live in a beautiful house and have beautiful kids the exact replica of you running around. And you'll look back on this moment..." He trailed off as he choked back a sob.

Liz pressed her forehead against his kissing his bloodstained lips.

"You'll look back at this moment, and you'll realize that leaving me behind was the best decision you could have ever made in your entire life."

Liz shook her head as tears streamed down her face. "I'll never do that."

"But you will...you will. You'll see then, that it was all worth it in the end."

"I love you," she whispered.

He nodded and squeezed his eyes shut tight.

"I love you too. Now...Go."


	12. Rage

**A/N: Well! I've been away for a while! RL consumes you around AP testing! This was written before Liz ever found out about Red killing Sam. I noticed that not many fics out there address**** the issue, so I wrote this! :D **

_**The Inside Out by Thomas Newman**_

* * *

**12\. Rage**

"You Son of a bitch"

He ducked as she threw a large vase at his head which missed him by mere inches and shattered against the wall behind him.

"It was you! You killed him!"

"Lizzie stop! Stop and listen for a moment!"

"Shut the hell up!" She said shrilly. She pulled her gun out and pushed the safety. "Shut. Up."

"Lizzie your making a mistake-"

"I SAID SHUT UP!" She roared and swung at his face smashing the butt of the gun against his face.

He grunted in pain and stepped back swiftly.

"You're going to die. Right now."

* * *

**A/N 2: I'll have more out soon!**


	13. Killer

**_Atlas by Coldplay _  
**

**Show me the way, lord, 'cause I... I'm about to explode**

* * *

**13\. Killer**

"I love you, Raymond."

The gun shot cracked across the room.

She looked like a porcelain doll. Her hair splayed around her as she fell forward. He could see the light go out from her beautiful eyes. The life from her rosy cheeks was drained in milliseconds.

And then she was face down on the floor.

He heard an animalistic roar reverberate throughout the warehouse. It pierced his ears and it took him several moments to realize that the roar was his.

_She's not dead. She's not dead. She's can't be gone_.

In front of him lays the horrifying truth.

* * *

**A/N: I'm sorry...the next one is better! I promise!**


	14. Restaurant

_**Dawn by Dario Marianelli **_

* * *

**14\. Restaurant**

They stared at the clump of oily food sitting on the plate in front of them.

"What the hell is that?" Liz asked in wonderment.

"I haven't the foggiest idea, Lizzie," he replied sounding just as mystified.

"It looks," Liz watched as what appeared to be a claw moved slightly. She gagged. "Alive!"

"I quite agree-this looks nothing like the lobster or clam chowder we ordered." Red quipped. "They might have mistaken our order."

Liz scoffed. "I'll say."

Red shook his head in dismay and waved a waiter over to them.

"Yes, sir how can I be of service?" The waiter asked courteously with a warm smile.

"Uh, yes, I have a question. What is this?" Red asked.

The waiter's smile faltered as his gaze fell upon the unappetizing dish on the table.

"I'm not quite sure sir..." he said in a disgusted tone.

Red nodded and wrinkled his nose. "Yes,well, we didn't order this...thing."

"I apologize sir, ma'am," He said as he grabbed the plate and put it in the cart of a passing busboy to get it out of sight. "What was your order?"

"Two bowls of clam chowder and a lobster," Liz replied grinning at Red over her beer.

Red nodded. "Yes."

The waiter scribbled in his notepad. "I'll get that out as soon as I can, and I'll throw in some shark ceviche on the house for the inconvenience."

"Lovely, thank you." Red replied.

The waiter nodded and bustled away into the restaurant.

Liz laughed. "Well that was fun."

"Mmm-sorry about that, they don't usually screw my orders up that badly when I come here alone."

He gazed across the balcony over the pier as the waves crashed against the piers pillars.

The sun is slowly sinking towards the horizon; lighting the sky on fire.

She'd been hesitant to accept his offer to dine with him, her being an F.B.I agent and all. It probably wouldn't look good if Cooper happened upon one of his agents and one of his most dangerous assets keeping each other amiable company; but she found herself enjoying his company more by the minute.

"Red?"

"Hmm?" He replied distractedly, watching the incoming waves with a wistful expression. He turned to her with a small smile.

"Ressler once told me that you like sailing... and you seem to like the ocean a lot...I mean you were in the Navy and all...why do you like it so much?"

He pondered her question carefully. For a moment, Liz thought he wasn't going to answer after a lengthy pause, but then he broke the silence with a quirk of his lips

"Perhaps it's because it feels like if one is standing at the very edge of the world. You can lose the rest of the world and yourself amongst that blue...black hole. So much mystery that we haven't seen lies inside the depths of those waters."

They sat together in comfortable silence gazing out over the pier.

She didn't pull away when he took her hand and intertwined their fingers..

* * *

**A/N: Love hearing your thoughts! **


	15. Wake Me Up

**_All of My Days by Alexi Murdoch _**

* * *

**15\. Wake me Up**

He feels a sharp jab on his eye but ignores it.

"Daddy." She says quietly. "Daddy?"

He can hear the sounds of Lizzie and Dembe working in the kitchen together.

Another sharp poke meets his left eye.

"Daddy!" She says loudly. "I know you're faking!"

He stays dead still.

Her curly brown hair brushes his nose as she leans her small face closer to his own.

"You're faking!"

"Yes!"

She cries as he suddenly grabs her against his chest and begins tickling her senseless.

"No daddy! No!" She giggles and helplessly kicks her tiny legs in the air. "Mommy say's you need to wake up! You're not allowed to be lazy today!"

He chuckles at his little girls words and buzzes her forehead with a kiss. "Hello, Rosy!" He says as he swings his legs out of bed and stand up with her in his arms. "Good morning, good morning!"

* * *

**A/N: So, was this one any less sad? Reviews welcome!**

**A/N 2: As always, thanks to Jackandsam for her support! You rock!**


	16. Drunk Texts

**A/N: This one is definitely a crack-drabble, and it's different from the others. Hope you enjoy! **

_**Money by Pink Floyd**_

* * *

**16\. Drunk Texts**

**Friday-1:30 AM **

**Liz :** You have a fuzzy head! Lol!

**Red :** I'm sorry Lizzie, but what do you mean?

**Liz:** Can I pet it?

**Red:** Are you drunk Lizzie, where are you?

**Liz:** Ew. Meera and Ressler are totes making out.

**Red:** Nice to know Agent Ressler can get some once in a while. Now, tell me where you are.

**Liz:** No.

**Red:** Yes.

**Liz:** No.

**Red:** Lizzie!

**Liz:** :( Fine...I'm at...uhhhh...oh! I'm at the Cosmo Bar on 24th and Willow Avenue.

**Red:** My my, Lizzie...you do have a taste for the night life.

**Liz:** Shut up.

**Red:** I'll be there in ten.

**RR. L. RR. L. RR. L. RR. L. RR. L. RR. L. RR. L. RR. L**

**Red:** I'm here. Where are you? We need to leave immediately. Some brazen harlot just threw her thong at my face.

**Liz:** Lol! Who's this!?

**Red:** Really Lizzie? How much more have you had to drink since we last spoke?! It's Red.

**Liz:** Hay Red! I'm not Liz.

**Red:** Who is this? Where's Lizzie?

**Liz:** It's Ressler! Meera managed to palm her phone! We're updating her Facebook status to 'Dating an Asshole Criminal' ;D

**Red:** Fabulous. I'm sure she'll appreciate that wicked lie. Where's Lizzie?

**Liz:** She's dancing on top of the bar.

Red blanched at that and looked up towards a rather large crowd of men who were crow calling a very inebriated Lizzie. She caught sight of him and grinned wickedly.

**Red: **Donny, when I get ahold of you I'm going to cut all of your fingers off with a dull knife.

**Liz: **Bite me.

**Red: **You can count on that.

**Liz: **I'm going home with Meera now! Byye!

**Red: **I'll find you.

He looked up from the phone towards the bar again. His eyes widened incredulously when he saw Lizzie reach down towards her blouse and begin pulling it off.

"Move!" He snarled, shoving a man away.

* * *

**A/N 2: So, what did you guys think? I thought that the songs tune would really go along with this one! **


	17. Don't Want to Fall in Love

**_Wicked Games by Chris Isaak _**

* * *

**17\. I Don't Want to Fall in Love**

Lizzie walks up ahead of him and then turns around laughing. Her luscious hair floats around her making her twinkling eyes stand out more.

_God, she's gorgeous._

The autumn sunlight filtering through the Central Park trees makes her look so serene. He loves her...so much, but she can't know.

Lizzie's said it before. He's proven it time and time again. He's a monster. That's all he'll ever be.

She gives him a wide smile, and he feels his heart leap with joy.

She deserves a better man. And he can't ever let her know that his heart belongs to her and her alone.

* * *

**A/N: If you guys haven't heard Chris Isaaks original version of the song, I really encourage you to do so! You won't regret it!**

**A/N 2: thanks for all the reviews you guys left on the last chapter! You guys are amazing! I _might _do a follow up for 'Drunken Texts' since you guys were so enthusiastic about it. But if I do it, it might be quite a while before I post it...**


	18. Achilles

_**May by Thomas Newman **_

* * *

**18\. Achilles**

I groan desperately and throw my head back against the armrest of the couch. The stifling heat has a chokehold around my throat. I'm going die.

I can feel it.

That's the terrible thing about this apartment. The damned heat builds up in here, and if I don't get some relief at this moment, I'll be joining Anslo Garrick in hell. I'm desperate.

I swing my legs over the couch and press my sweaty brow against my hands.

Shit. I hate this weather.

I get up and shrug my vest off and begin to unbutton my already half buttoned shirt and throw that across the room in frustration. The pants go next as I practically tear those off as well and they go flying towards the table piled with books. I stand there in the center of the room in my boxers heaving a sigh of relief when a small breeze floats in through the open windows. The curtains stretch out towards me and then fall back against the French windows. Damn it. That was so brief.

I think I'm going lose my mind. If there's one weakness in this world that I have aside from my girl, Lizzie it's the heat.

I hate it. I don't mind the warm sun, but this is ridiculous. It's like a billion degrees out in the city; perhaps more in here.

I stride to the kitchen and feel my bare feet stick against the hardwood floor. When I get to the sink I turn the cold water on full blast and stick my head under the faucet.

The sound of the running water fills my ears, but I really don't give a damn. The cool water is bringing some sweet relief as it trails over my neck and shoulders.

"Red?"

I start and bump my head against the faucet in surprise, sending water splashing down my back. Lizzie stands there watching me with an amused, and slightly bewildered expression.

"What are you doing?" She laughs.

"Lizzie! What a pleasant surprise!" I cry as I grab a towel, run it under the water, and throw it over my neck. " I'm miserable! This heat, it's killing me!"

She laughs and places a plastic bag on the island. "Well…I brought you a treat that I thought you might like to help cool you off." Her eyes trail down my half-naked body and I can see her cheeks flush slightly. "Though I can see that you've already made an attempt to do so."

"Like what you see?" I grin at her. She rolls her eyes. I walk over and peer inside the bag and pull out some large orange popsicles.

"I know you like orange sherbet, so I brought you some orange flavored fruit pops."

I laugh and lean towards her, pressing a kiss near her lips. She smiles brightly at me.

"Thank you, Lizzie, that was very thoughtful." After pulling the wrapper off I take a large bite, relishing the coldness spreading in my mouth. I moan in pleasure.


	19. Death

_**Alpha by Marc Streitenf**__**eld **_

* * *

**19\. Death**

I read the epitaph on his grave just like I do each time I come here.

_February 7__th__ 1960-August 4__th__ 2018_

_Beloved father, friend, and lover_

I thought it would be nice to leave the grave nameless…to keep his sense of mystery alive even beyond his death. I'm sure he would've loved that. Red was a man who had a flair for the dramatic. He was such a drama queen.

I laugh at the thought. He would've been appalled to have heard me tell him that.

We hadn't been together for as long as I would've liked to have been when they finally caught up us. We were out in London sitting in a café when they shot at us from an SUV. Red, being the knight in shining armor, threw himself in front of me, getting himself riddled with bullets in the process. Maybe I am ungrateful for his sacrifice…but I wish it had been me who had gotten killed instead. Then I wouldn't have to endure the pain of his loss. He was larger than life…

I turn back towards my husband and baby boy where they stand on top of the hill. I named him Raymond. To remember.


	20. Awake

**A look into how Red passes sleepless nights...**

_**Line of Fire by Junip **_

* * *

**20\. Awake**

I stand in front of the wall window gazing down at the hundreds of cars driving in the traffic jam one hundred stories below me. The city life looks beautiful, with all of it's flickering lights like stars amongst the people below. I feel so disconnected from the world.

I can't remember the last time I took a walk amongst the crowds of people and felt as if I had a genuine connection to them. I feel nothing but distance. Maybe the last traces of humanity have been sucked out of me along with the joy. Either way….I'm still awake.


	21. Ball

_**Kiss From a Rose Unplugged by Seal **_

* * *

**21\. Ball**

She is without a doubt, the most beautiful woman to breath air on this earth. Her graceful movements as she walked down the staircase towards him kept him enchanted. His gaze was transfixed on her as the lovely satin dress flowed around her shapely legs. His heart skipped.

"Lizzie, you look amazing," he said huskily as she reached the bottom and gazed at him shyly.

"Thanks," she mumbled as she nervously pulled her bangs behind her ear. "Um-you don't look to bad yourself." She bit her lip, trying to hold back a grin.

"Hmm, this old thing?" he said saucily adopting his valley boy voice, she had heard him use it once at the Embassy. "I just threw it on!"

She laughed as she grasped his proffered arm. "Are you sure I'm not overdressed?"

"Positive, I wouldn't tell you otherwise for fear that you would go back upstairs and change. You're gorgeous."

She smiled at him as they walked outside of the mansion they had been staying at for the day.

Dembe gave them both a wide grin as he held the door open and she slipped inside the car.

The car ride to the restaurant Red had picked for the night was brief. However, Liz felt a rush of excitement each time his thumb flickered over her shoulder . He caught her staring at him from the corner of her eye several times, and he chuckled quietly when she blushed and hastily averted her gaze.

"I think you'll love it here Lizzie! It's like something out of a fairy tale!" he told her when they stopped in front of an elegant building with classic architecture.

It reminded her almost of a cathedral, except for the rather large floor to ceiling windows which revealed a twinkling chandelier and a bustle of people inside. A wonderful attempt at making it look modern yet tasteful at the same time.

Dembe gave the keys to the valet and walked several steps behind them as they went inside. He refused to dine with them this evening, choosing instead, to eat at a separate table and give them time to kindle the fire that he had sensed long before.

Red and Lizzie were escorted to a private dining area with open French doors. They faced a balcony that overlooked the Hudson River; across the river the city lights twinkled like stars, making the skyline look tremendous.

"It's beautiful" she breathed as they sat at a table on the balcony.

"This is one of my most favorite views here in Washington. I love the way the everything seems so still from way out here. So silent…" he trailed off and smiled at her.

She grinned and heard the stirring notes to a piano tune. The song sounded vaguely familiar.

She cocked her head to the side and listened. Inside she caught a glimpse of a man in coattails playing at a grand piano.

She turned back to Red and felt her heart jump when he held a red rose out to her.

"Dance with me," he whispered.

She nodded and took his hand when he stood up. He gently held her hand in his and wrapped the other around her waist caressing her side.

"There, used to be a graying tower alone on the sea…you became. ..the light on the dark side of me…" he sang into her ear in a light voice.

"Kiss from a rose," she said.

His eyes filled with amusement and warmth and he nodded.

"That's why you brought the red rose," she said in realization.

"You're my rose, Lizzie," he whispered against her ear.

* * *

**A/N: So, how did I do?**


	22. The Asylum

_**Skyfall by Adele **_

**I've drowned and dreamt this moment  
So overdue I owe them**

* * *

**22\. The Asylum**

Raymond stared intently at the woman behind the one way mirror. She was completely unaware of the fact that he was watching her.

Cooper spoke quietly. "She hasn't talked to anyone since announcing that she'd only speak to you. No one can get through to her. We thought perhaps she would open up to you..."

Raymond tilted his head to the side watching as she scrutinized the window piercing him with a dull gaze.

"Yeah….well, we'll see about that." Red chuckled softly and moved towards the door. He pressed his thumb against the scanner at the door before it gave a deafening screech and unlocked.

He strode in, pushing his glasses up his nose and reviewing the notes he had on her. "I'm special agent Reddington, Quantico's head psychologist. You are Elizabeth..." He peered under a page on the folder. "Keen...and you," he pointed a finger at her. "Have asked for me. Now tell me, what's this about?" He said crossing his arms over his chest.

She watched him with amused eyes giving him a defiant glare. "You know what this is about, Red."

Raymond felt his heart drop slightly at the name, but he quickly schooled his expression and stared right back at her, giving no indication that he knew what she was talking about.

"Come now, Red. I know all about Tom. I know everything. How he was keeping tabs on you for his boss."

Raymond pulled his lips to a grim line.

"Berlin?" She prodded further. Her eyes glinted mischievously. "The psychologists say I'm crazy. He's convinced them of it. Tom has people in the hospitals. In the police. Here."

"What do you want?" He demanded.

"I can help you, Red," she said beseechingly. "And I think you can help me, with your former..connections."

"What could I possibly need your help with Miss Keen?" He laughed with mirth.

She gazed at him sadly. "Alexandra? Elsa?"

His lips twitched slightly. Nice play.

They sat, staring at each other, measuring each other up for several long moments.

"Alright," he finally said. "If we do this. We do things my way. Understood?"

She nodded. "Understood."

"If you betray my confidence in any way, rest assured I will take back what you owe me."

She nodded.

"When do we start?" She asked.

Raymond considered her words. Was he really going to revert to his old ways?

"This is gonna be a gas," he mumbled under his breath.

* * *

**A/N: *cackles manically* I love it when a drabble comes together...**


	23. Pressure

**Set after The Kingmaker**

_**The Sun is shining down by JJ Grey and Mofro**_

* * *

**23\. Pressure**

_Monster_

He can't let her see how much her words affect him. That would prove that the cracks on his walls are growing bigger; because of her. He won't allow her to see the affect she has on him; not if he can help it. Instead, he keeps the agony bottled up inside. Hate, anger, revenge. That's what he lets himself be driven by. Nothing else.

Raymond Reddington was the larger than life father that held a little girl in his arms and kissed a wonderful wife on the cheek when he arrived home from work long ago. Red Reddington is the monster who puts up a facade of confidence and oozes sex appeal. He has no wife or daughter to take the mask off of his hardened face.

He only has that ray of sunshine that evades him at every twist and turn. It feels like he's trying to grasp onto a rope made of sand. She doesn't want him. Doesn't see how much he loves her. Lizzie doesn't realize the hold she has on his heart, or perhaps she purposely ignores how captivated he has become by her. Each morning he wakes up holding his breath until he finally gets his first dose of her; catching a glimpse of her at the Post Office, or some other obscure place he has chosen. And when he does catch sight of that beautiful face, it's like the wind has been knocked out of him and he has fallen down a black abyss, unable to climb back out.

She can't see the power she wields over him. Red thinks perhaps she'll never want to know. Not when she holds the knowledge that he killed Sam.

Frustration floods his heart and his blood boils. He sees red.

The large elegant living room feels as if it's closing in on him. With a roar, he grabs the whiskey bottle sitting beside him on the table and flings its across room. But the sound of the glass shattering into a million little pieces isn't satisfying enough, so he grabs the small table and smashes it against the wall as well; watching as it breaks apart with a crunch.

He falls to his knees and grasps at his head letting an animalistic roar escape his lips. For a moment, he thinks he's heard a wounded animal.

"GOD! DAMN IT!" The words echo around him, making the emptiness of the room all the more noticeable.

Elizabeth Keen has broken him and she can't see it. She's blind to the fact that he loves her. It can't be obsession if it's love, can it?

But now he needs to gain control. The pressure can't explode. Not now. Not when he needs his control the most.

His breathing comes out with small heaves after the explosion of emotion. He leans back on his calves and runs his hand over his face wearily, then gets to his feet with a groan. It's time to make another plan. He needs her.


	24. Song

_**Practical Arrangement by Sting**_

* * *

**24\. Song**

Liz walked into the unfamiliar country house Red had been staying at recently. Dembe greeted her with a quirk on his lips and a nod before going out the door just as she went inside, leaving her to wonder what it was the he found so amusing. She shook her head and glanced around Red's current home for the next week or so. He usually tended to stay in rural areas for a week at the most.

The furnishing looked very simple and traditional from what she could tell. Obviously someone with good taste had decorated around here. Her eyebrows pulled together when she heard a deep voice singing somewhere in the house.

"Red?" She called in confusion.

The voice continued to sing, oblivious to the fact that someone else was in the house. It didn't sound like a person, it sounded more like a someone on the radio. It sounded too nice to to be someone in the house

She walked further into the living room and turned a corner to see a rather large kitchen with sleek utilities; the brightness of the reflections given off by everything made her squint slightly. Her heart jumped when she caught sight of him. There, with his back turned to her, stood Red at the counter mixing something in a big bowl.

_"One roof over our heads! A warm house to return to...we could sleep in separate beds...or I could sleep alone-or learn to..."_

She felt her heart jump at seeing him there, looking so relaxed and singing these words with such vehemence.

"Red?" She called again.

He turned to her with a slightly startled expression. With a wide grin he stalked towards her and continued singing.

_"I'm not suggesting that we'd have some earthly paradise forever!"_

Red grabbed both of her hands and his and kissed them gently, then pulled her closer towards him; making her heart jump to her throat. His hand was on her waist now as his other one guided them to the smooth tempo of his tune.

_"I mean how often does that happen now, the answers probably never. Now we can come to an arrangement. A practical arrangement. And you could learn to love me..." _He seared her eyes with his own.

He was trying to tell her something with the gaze he was holding on her, and she was trying to respond.

_"Given time."_

* * *

**A/N: _Practical Arrangement _(as you can see above) is by Sting. The song comes from his musical called _The Last Ship, _I highly recommend that you listen to it!**


	25. Spectre

_**Your Love Means Everything by Coldplay**_

* * *

**25\. Specter**

Liz sat on the floor with her back against the wall staring listlessly across the sparsely furnished living room. She and Dembe had decided to close this one down since he hadn't been as fond of this one as he had been of Frederik's. He'd willed that one to her. She could see why. She had grown to love it just as much as he had.

Hudson whined sadly at the near emptiness of the apartment. Liz laughed when he titled his head at her, almost in question.

"I know buddy, I miss him too," she said stroking his head.

"Not for long," Liz froze at the familiar voice.

Hudson's head gave out from under her hand as he barked happily and ran towards the source of the voice.

"Hey boy. Are you taking care of Lizzie for me?"

Liz stared with a slack jaw as she watched Red kneel down and playfully push Hudson's head down.

But he looked...strange. He was wearing his usual beige vest and some pale slacks. But she could see _through_ his body catching a good glimpse of the window and sunlight streaming in behind him.

"R-Red." She breathed weakly.

He looked up at her from his knelt position and smiled sadly. "Hello Lizzie."

"But-you died! I saw you," She cut her rambling off and tried to gather her bearings. She squeezed her eyes shut, thinking that perhaps all the grief was making her hallucinate.

When she opened them, he was still standing there, giving her that annoying amused look.

"Hello, Lizzie," He said again.

Liz felt her breathing hitch in panic. "Wh-what the hell are you doing here?" She burst out.

He stood up and walked over to her. Except, the way he approached her was different. He moved with so much more grace. He knelt in front of her and smoothed his palm over her cheek leaving a faint warmth. She reached out and put her hand over his translucent one. Tears prickled at the edge of her eyes.

"Red?"

"I'm sorry things ended this way, Lizzie. I had to do this for you. There was no other way."

She nodded. "What are you doing here? Am I going crazy? Is this real?" She mumbled in a wavering voice.

He barked out a laugh. "Yes. I'm a ghost, Lizzie. Surprisingly, I wasn't damned straight to hell. Lucky bastard that I am, I was given a second chance at redemption."

"How?" She breathed out.

"I've been assigned the task of being your guardian angel."

Liz's brain felt muddled while trying to take all of this in at the same time.

"So, you're staying?"

"No, sweetheart. I'll pass between worlds, yes. I've only been given the chance to present myself to you. And say goodbye."

Liz felt her face contort at his last words. A sob escaped her, she buried her face in his neck.

"Listen to me, Lizzie. Wherever I am, you need only say the word, and I'll be there to protect you."

* * *

**A/N: I'm sorry...I can't help it with the angst! It's the prompts that do it, I swear! Special thanks to Jackandsam, as always!**


	26. Candlelight

**A/N: So this prompt was given to me on tumblr. Unfortunately, I no longer have the email of that person. So, whoever you are, this one's for you!**

_**When I Was in Your Heart by David Gray**_

* * *

**26\. Candlelight**

The small flame ignites with a faint -_click_\- and she can see the outline of his wrist in the darkness as his hand goes into the lantern and puts the lighter to the oiled candle.

"Ah-better," Red says once the lantern encompasses the whole cottage with a warm glow from the candle.

Liz hums in agreement. Were they not on such cold terms after the whole, 'you killed my father' ordeal, she'd tell him that she really hates the dark. And fire. Especially little flames. For some reason, this particular flame doesn't feel frightening though. Perhaps it's because she's with him, she thinks whimsically.

No, she can't allow those types of thoughts to evade her mind. He's a cold hearted criminal who killed her father. He would probably kill her were it not for his delusional assumption that they are in fact partners.

"I'm sorry about that," He tells her.

She glances at him with a confused expression.

"The generator going out I mean. I know how much you hate the dark...and fire."

_Of course he knows_, she thinks bitterly.

"It's fine," she says rather darkly.

"Only I don't want you to feel uncomfortable around me, Lizzie," He continues as if she didn't say anything. "I know that things have been...strained between us since you found out the truth about Sam."

She snorts rather ungracefully. "You think?"

He frowns at her, making his lips stretch into a thin line. "I would like for us to be friends again, Lizzie."

She gazes at the lantern's small flame which has brightened the whole room.

"This whole thing, Lizzie...this Blacklist. I am doing this for you," he says softly as he leans towards her on the narrow couch that they're sitting on.

She tenses slightly.

"You may not believe me, and you probably know that I can't tell you in what ways this is for you…but I just…want you to know that-" He trails off when she doesn't even turn his way.

They sit there in silence with his words looming between them. She briefly wonders what he was about to say. Could he have possibly been about to confess that he….no….he wouldn't.

"Lizzie," he says in a hoarse voice. "Please." He gasps.

She turns to face him and is surprised to see unshed tears shining in his eyes.

"Please, just, say something." A single tear escapes the corner of his eyes as the skin around his jaw ripples with each clench he gives it.

His sudden display of emotion makes her realize how much she really does mean to him.

"I do trust you, Red. With my life," She reaches out towards his hand and he grasps onto it as if his very life depends on this small connection between them.

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive you for what you did to Sam, but I know that I can trust you."

"Good. Because I'd give my life for you. And I love you."

* * *

**A/N: The next one will be pure fluff! I promise! And another shout out to my friend, Jackandsam!**


	27. Ticklish

_**Feelin Alright by Traffic**_

* * *

**27\. Ticklish**

Lizzie and Red were sprawled across the large couch in the living room of Red's newest safe house. He leaned back against the chaise listlessly, gazing up at the ceiling as his fingers unconsciously carded through Lizzie's hair. She shifted her head on the crook of his folded leg and looked up at him with a doeful expression. She yawned and stretched her body languidly throwing her harms above her head and gently running her fingers across Reds neck.

"I'm bored," she mumbled dully. "I don't think I've ever been bored when I'm with you, Ray."

Red dropped his head forward to look down at her. Liz gazed up at him as her hands continued their exploration of his neck as if they were searching for something there; some type of weak spot in the unbendable Raymond Reddington. He huffed a laugh when her fingers glided across his sensitive skin again.

"Well," he said with glittering eyes, "At the risk of sounding cliché, there's a first time for everything," he murmured drowsily. He chuckled again when she deliberately began running her fingers over the invisible stubble on his neck.

She narrowed her eyes at the first sign of weakness. "Do I detect...," She trailed off and grinned mischievously. She ran her hand over his smooth skin making him shy away from her touch with a laugh.

She grinned widely at her discovery. "You're ticklish!" She said triumphantly.

Red laughed and shook his head with an almost incredulous expression, as if challenging her to prove the obvious.

"Aren't you?" She said accusingly.

He gave her a blank expression and bit the corner of his lip; a tell she knew meant that she was in warm waters.

"Are you just going to make this more difficult?" She asked when he drew her hands away from him and held them between their bodies.

"Hmm?

Red grinned at her roguishly, not saying a word. He bent down towards her face, stopping a beat before he could touch her lips.

"You're ticklish," she said as she stared at his pouting lips.

His half lidded gazed grew amused.

She swiftly pulled her hands away from him and straddled him as she pushed him down against the sofa. He grunted and began to laugh loudly as she dug her fingers under his blue linen shirt into his ribs and up his sides.

"No. No," he gasped as he desperately tried to pry her hands away from him. Unfortunately for him, he was laughing too hard to ever get an upper hand.

"Admit it," she demanded.

"No." He pawed at the air trying to grab her between laughs. His face turned slightly pink and his big smile made him look even more boyish.

"Admit it!"

"I give," he gasped as she finally ceased her assault. He laid there trying to catch his breath, peering at her blearily. "Fine," he muttered as she smirked at him. "I'm ticklish."

She giggled.

"You're fun!" He told her with a grin.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks to red-ace-of-spades for the prompt! Hope you guys liked it! **


	28. Motorcycle

_**Walkin on the Sun by Smashmouth**_

* * *

**28\. Motorcycle**

"Red, we can't just-"

Liz's voice drowned out as the metallic monster gave a rather demonic roar as he revved the Chopper's engine.

"I'm sorry I can't hear you, Lizzie, what were you saying, can you say that again?" Red asked as he cocked his head towards her.

"You can't just-"

He twisted his hand and revved the engine once more making her own words sound silent to her ears.

She folded her arms and glared at him.

He laughed. "I'm sorry, Lizzie, that was mean-but I couldn't pass up the chance! I've always wanted to do things like those silly eighties movies with those, 'Greasers' and 'rebels without causes." He smiled at her and preoccupied himself by adjusting his black suspenders over his dress shirt and straightening his black bow tie.

She rolled her eyes at him.

"What are you waiting for Lizzie?" He asked cheerfully. "Hop on!"

Liz shook her head in disbelief. "Red, we had to report back to Cooper half an hour ago! It's half past twelve already!"

"Which is why I asked Dembe to drop off my motorcycle," he replied.

"If you think I am risking my life by getting on that..that thing with you then you are so wro-"

"Come now, Lizzie," he held his hand out to her with a charismatic grin. "I'd never put your life at risk. Not intentionally. Have faith in me...this once."

She stared at him. He continued to hold his hand out to her, giving her those eyes. No! Not those eyes! He was almost begging her with those damned beautiful eyes!

She reached out reluctantly towards his hand.

_God, you're so weak Elizabeth_, she thought to herself.

He grasped her fingers in his hand and helped her settle herself behind him; making sure that her overcoat hid her long red dress. He would not have her looking immodest because of his adrenaline junkie behavior.

She hesitated before grabbing onto his shoulders nervously.

"Surely, we can do better than that," he said as she grabbed the proffered helmet from his hand. She snapped the black helmet around her chin and wiped her sweaty palms on her coat.

Before she could put her hands back on his shoulder, he reached behind him, grabbed her arms and wrapped them tightly around his waist. She smiled as he looked back at her.

"Hold on as tight as you'd like Lizzie!"

* * *

**A/N: JackandSam, you know you're the best! Thanks to eaglechica19 for the prompt! Let me know what you guys think!**


	29. Pens

**A/N: Prompt given to me by blacklistredpill. Thank you very much! Enjoy!**

**_Grey Room by Damien Rice_**

**I've still got me to cross your bridge in this storm  
And I've still got me to keep you warm**

* * *

**29\. Pens**

"I never tell you everything," Red tells her in an indifferent tone.

Liz gives him an embittered laugh and throws her hands in the air turning her back on him. "You're a real bastard you know that?" She says darkly as she slowly makes her way to a small table that holds a rather expensive Spanish statue belonging to the owner of the mansion. She grabs it and smashes it against the wall, but the loud crash does nothing to ease her frustration.

She turns to him furiously, and he watches her with those familiar sorrowful eyes. The eyes he gives her when he knows that some form of pain is coming his way from her.

"You're a real bastard," she says again, enjoying how the sting of her words feels on her tongue. He winces at her venomous voice and she continues. "You tell me you care for me, make me believe that my life is worth giving a damn! You take, take, take, but you never give any more emotion than what suits your needs! You don't give a damn about me-so here's some news for you; I don't give two shits about you either," she snarls at him. They both know her words are lies.

All the same, it doesn't stop the hurt he feels in his heart. His soul is crying silently as she glares at him with such hate. Such contempt. How can that ever come out of an angel like her?

He looks around him for a moment, and begins patting down his pockets when he doesn't find what he wants.

She freezes when he pulls out a shiny silver pen with a needle-like tip. He presses it into her palm, and she can't help but let a few tears escape her eyes when he hastily fumbles with his collar buttons and his tie to reveal a faint white scar where she pierced his skin in anger all those months ago.

Without another thought she raises the pen, thinking of the sick satisfaction that she'd feel at seeing him hurt. But then she hears it. And sees it. A quiet sob escapes his lips, and his green eyes are distracting themselves, gazing at some unknown object as tears stream down his face.

She drops the pen and grabs his face turning him to face her full on.

"I'm sorry, Lizzie," he gasps softly. "I don't mean to hurt you." She can barely hear his words.

She sighs and presses a gentle his to his neck, where her mark is. A permanent mark made by her. He's hers.

And she, his.

"I'm sorry," he whispers and she silences him with her lips.

"Be quiet," she breathes against his mouth. She slides his vest off of his broad shoulders, and tears his shirt open letting them both fall to the floor.

"Please," he says hoarsely, "Don't hate me."

She kisses his neck, and gently nips his shoulder beneath the scar. Finally, she grabs hold of his belt.

"You know that's not possible," she whispers quietly.

* * *

**AN2: Thanks to my lovely friend JackandSamforever! You rock! **


	30. Boxers

**_Give me Love by Ed Sheeran _**

* * *

**30\. Boxers**

"Red?"

Liz knew she probably shouldn't be in his room without his permission, but she was sure he wouldn't mind. He wasn't shy about barging into her room. So he had no need to be upset about this.

"In here," he called.

She walked into the room's bathroom.

Red stood with his back to her mixing his shaving soap with a brush. There was a steamy smell in the air that filled her nose with his Irish body wash. It was refreshing. Almost like spring.

What captured Liz's attention though, was the fact that he stood before her in nothing but black trousers; suspenders hanging loosely at his hips. Right above the waist band, Liz caught sight of his white boxer shorts.

She bit her lip to keep from giggling like a school girl. However, it didn't stop an amused huff from escaping her.

Red glanced at her over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow. She blushed. The corner of his mouth pulled to a warm smile.

"Yes?" He inquired when she laughed lightly.

Liz shook her head. "Nothing, I just didn't take you for a white boxers type of guy."

Red chucked quietly, "Pray tell, what type of man did you take me for?"

Liz shrugged, "I don't know." She really didn't know now that she thought about it.

"Black silk?"

Red threw his head back and laughed loudly, "Your guess is not far from the truth."

Liz gave him a questioning look.

He smiled and closely watched the soap as it turned white and fluffy. "I do own several...high end silk undergarments."

She laughed and studied the rippling muscles on his back as he began rubbing the lather across his jaw line and beneath his neck. She felt a surge of boldness run through her.

"Do you wear them often?" She asked.

The corner of his eye twitched in amusement. "For special occasions." He quipped.

Liz inched her way to him and stood shoulder to shoulder with him. She leaned against the marble counter, facing his direction and pressed her palms against the cool stone.

Red watched her closely with a half lidded gaze.

"When do you think the next special occasion will be?" She asked.

"I think it will be soon," he murmured.

She moved her face closer to his so that they were inches away from each other.

Liz began moving between him and the counter and Red readily made room for her so that he was pressing against her.

"Hmm," his eyes darted down her face and across body. "I like this."

She smirked and grabbed his shoulders to pull him around so that he was the one against the sink.

Liz picked up the long silver blade he had waiting; sharpened and ready for use. Red watched her as she ran her hands down his chest. She motioned for him to sit on the counter. He heaved himself up and settled himself on top.

With precise hands, she slowly slid the blade against his skin. The white foam built up at the edge of the blade, and she cleaned it off with a towel. He smiled as she continued her smooth movements, grooming him with a soft touch. He was in her hands, and he didn't mind one bit.

When she finally scraped the last remnants of the cream off, she grinned at him and wiped his face down with a warm towel.

"All done." She said happily.

He grinned as she ran her soft hands down his face, enjoying the feel of her hands.

"Thank you, Lizzie," he murmured.

She smiled and pressed her lips against his.

* * *

**A/N: Well, that was fun! **


	31. Boisterous

**A/N: The long awaited sequel to 'Drunk Texts'**

_**Fire by The Ohio Players**_

* * *

**31\. Boisterous**

"Skin! Skin! Skin!"

Loud boisterous chants from people around him made Red cringe at the buzzing sensation it caused his ears. Drunken men around him pushed and stumbled against him. The hot and stuffy environment made him feel heady.

Red huffed in annoyance when a young man giggling like a lunatic stumbled and grabbed onto his shoulder to keep from falling. He pried the man's hand away and pushed him aside.

"Come on girl! Take it off!" Someone amongst the crowd called.

Lizzie smiled teasingly and lifted her shirt higher above her waist revealing a large portion of her stomach.

Red pushed forward frantically. He slid between a man and a woman who were grinding against each other rather provocatively.

"Move," he said loudly. His words sounded faint to his own ears.

"MOVE," Red said again and stared down the woman when she tried to put her hands around his neck.

She moved away in a huff, but Red didn't care.

Lizzie was now swaying her hips in a way that made Red feel dizzy, and it wasn't because of the crowded environment this time.

She bit the corner of her lip and a mischievous glint flashed in her eyes when she saw him again. The long milky glass had a white light shining beneath it making it look as if Lizzie was on a catwalk rather than on a bar.

Out of the corner of his eye, Red caught sight of a hand reaching up to grab at her rear end. He pushed against the crowd with all of his strength and lurched forward grabbing at the hand's forearm.

"What the hell man?" A man with dark wavy hair cried indignantly. Red walked forward, twisting the mans arm, causing him to walk backward against the crowd.

"Don't," Red bit out angrily. He bared his teeth at him and clenched his jaw.

"What do you care? She's the one up there acting like a freaking-"

Red abruptly cut the mans words off with a swift punch to his jaw. He promptly fell into a heap on the floor. Everyone stood around him, staring at him in their drunken stupor.

"God!" Red winced and turned back to the bar and quickly jumped onto the nearest stool. He stood slightly above her waist and she turned to him clumsily, smiling brightly at him.

She raised her eyebrow at him boldly. "Come to dance with me bad boy?"

The crowd hollered in anticipation.

"We need to go, Lizzie. _Now_." He looked up at her as she laughed.

"I'm gonna stay here, Red. It's so-oooo much fun!" She said and she threw her hands above her head, swaying to the loud obnoxious music.

"Come on Lizzie," Red said sternly. He held his palm out towards her and she pouted at him.

"Spoil sport, you don't let me have any fun! You like keeping it all to yourself!" She reluctantly took his hand and lowered herself on top of the bar so that she was sitting instead of stumbling on it.

Red jumped off of the stool with a slight groan at the impact on his knees.

Lizzie swung her legs happily as the crowd around them groaned in disappointment.

"You suck!" Red heard somewhere amongst them. He chuckled to himself. With steady hands, he grabbed Lizzie around the waist and helped her jump down. She stumbled even with his support, she wouldn't be able to walk in this state. He finally decided to pick her up, bridal style and carry her.

"Boo!"

The chorus of defeat followed him as he walked outside with a giggling Lizzie in his arms.

* * *

**AN2: How did I do? Leave your thoughts! **


	32. Vengeance

_**Lovers Spit by Broken Social Scene**_

* * *

**32\. Vengeance**

All he can think about is getting to her the way she got to him. It's all he wants now. The thought consumes him every waking moment, every day. Sometimes, it feels like a million shards of broken glass pressing against his heart. It's because of her.

And that constricting weight that he carries with him in his chest serves as a reminder that all of this, is because of her….

It doesn't bother him though. Not anymore. Because it reminds him of how he came to be this way. Months of working alongside her made him immune to the pain. He doesn't need any reminders to know that the brutal and exhausting work he is putting into all of this is worth the trouble. In the end, she'll feel exactly what he's felt all these months.

Lizzie will know what he's been suffering, silently, from a distance while working with her. She'll come to see what the world looks like though his eyes. It's not all black and white like she thinks. There are hints of red, and blue in there too, just like there is ice to fire. She's the ice to his flame. She's cooled the rage that he carried in his soul after losing his wife and his little girl. He no longer feels like a ghost drifting in and out of villas and lavish hotel rooms. The dullness of waking to a book and a game of chess no longer seems as tasteless as it did before.

He can cope with idling away several hours over some mindless game with Dembe. As long as he knows that at the end of the day, he'll always have her to look forward to. The breathtaking pain will keep him company the whole time that she's sitting beside him on the love seat. But she'll be there with him., nonetheless. She won't be some figment of his imagination that he's come up with in order to quell some deep desire that has ignited after a long lonely night of drinking and jazz. Instead, she'll be there, right beside him to banter with him about how tiring it is to attempt to hold any semblance of a normal conversation with him.

A chuckle bubbles at his throat at the memories of their last few conversations together.

"God, Red," She often huffs in frustration. "Do you even know how to use words that aren't so embellished anymore?"

To be honest, he doesn't think his conversations could quite pass for casual by anyone's standards.

That's of no consequence, not when he has planning to do. He needs to get back at her for what she's done to him. What she's stolen. He'll plan his vengeance carefully...they say it is best served cold. In this case, it will most likely ignite a fire between them if he's lucky. He's confident in his abilities to carry this out with precision.

He'll steal her heart, and keep it for himself, the way she stole his.

* * *

**A/N: **I've been gone for quite a while. Sorry about that...but it is my final year of high-school, and I'll be graduating this coming Thursday. Naturally, because of this, our teachers piled up research papers for us. RL guys, RL...****

****When I first posted this collection, I started off with only twenty-five drabbles. Your amazing response encouraged me to write more. ****

****I've never had so many reviews to one of my stories, and you have all been very generous. There are now only three drabbles left...after long consideration I have decided to take a bit of a break with posting any more new ones. So...we will most likely reach thirty-five and after that there will be a hiatus. When I have about fifteen or thirty new drabbles, I will resume posting...for now...I just want to thank you all for your support. So, thank you all!****


	33. Serenity

_**Hear You Breathing by Stuart Reid **_

* * *

**33\. Serenity**

These days he tends to wake up to the darkness of civil twilight, right when the grey and blue hues begin to swirl together in the sky outside of the open French doors. Small mewling cries usually rouse him from his peaceful slumber, Red has slept lightly ever since they brought him home.

He stirs awake at dawn after a restful sleep and pads down to the nursery as if pulled by some invisible golden chain. Polished floorboards creak beneath his bare feet when he pauses at the doorway. There, inside the elaborately decorated willow crib made by his hand, lies what draws him from his dreams.

As if sensing his father's presence, a tiny fist reaches up, peeking between the bars followed by a quiet coo.

Red feels as if he would disturb the beautiful environment if he ventured further into the room. But the cooing becomes more insistent and he finally gives in, making the floor groan quietly as he approaches the crib.

Light green eyes greet him wonderingly.

"You're an early riser like your old man aren't you, son?" Red murmurs in amusement.

At the sound of the deep familiar voice a beautiful smile graces the baby's soft features. Tiny hands flutter in the air towards Red like small butterflies.

Misery is something of the past. So is loneliness. Honestly, Red can't remember what it feels like to be in pain. Lizzie managed to pull his soul out of the dark abyss he had allowed himself to sink into during his relentless pursuit of his own form of justice.

Now he feels true happiness; joy at seeing his boy reach out towards him with such trust. He's completely unaware of the storm Red went through just to get to him and his mother. This little one doesn't know how much pride he fills his father with; can't possibly begin to understand what it means to have him and Lizzie in his life.

A long slender finger reaches out and reverently caresses the soft cheek. The tiny hand grasps the finger tightly and watches the looming hand in the darkness.

The air between them is filled with a quiet chuckle. Red finally relents, despite his better judgment. He carefully picks him up from the cocoon of blankets, filling his large hands with the feather light body. His son's little pajama clad feet swing and kick at the air in delight, knowing that he's safe with his father.

Red knows he'll never bring himself to put him down after seeing that reaction.

"Now..." Red murmurs as he holds him against his chest. "Sam, what shall we do to pass the time? We can't play chess anymore. Mommy got mad the last time she found us on the couch."

Samuel gives a shriek of delight at his words.

Red nods in agreement. "Yes, I think that's a wonderful idea."

They'll probably get scolded for it in the morning. Nonetheless, Red goes to the kitchen and pulls out a carton of chocolate ice cream.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry about the long wait guys! Problems with the internet...I'm now officially out of high school and waiting to go to college! You know what that means! More writing will get done during this stories hiatus! Perhaps I'll be able to get the story back up earlier than anticipated. **

**A/N 2: Unfortunately, the next chapter will be the last for the story hiatus, and it will be angsty... *runs away***


	34. Nowhere to Return

**A/N: Coincides with 'Watching You'**

**_Use Somebody by Scala and Kolcany Brothers _**

* * *

**34\. Nowhere to Return**

_Off in the night, while you live it up, I'm off to sleep  
_

_Waging wars to shape the poet and the beat  
_

_I hope it's gonna make you notice  
_

_I hope it's gonna make you notice_

_Someone like me_

White wisps escaped Reds lips with each chilled breath he took.

He watched as the air danced in curling tendrils in front of him, dissolving into the night sky; he almost wished that he could dissolve into the darkness along with it. Red turned on his heel and strained his eyes down the dark snow covered street. Alone. Completely alone. Everything was deadly still. Not one sign of life was anywhere to be seen. To any other person, it might have seemed eerie. To Red, it wasn't any different from most of the other roads he had taken in his life, always alone and in the dark.

She changed all of that. He had forced her to walk this road with him. Ever astute, he could see that this wasn't a path that this beautiful, noble woman was meant for. She needed to be set free to make a life for herself.

They had caught the final name on the list only half hour ago. Thus with a lighter spirit, Red had decided to mull over the past few months by himself. Perhaps it was time to go now.

The snow crunched beneath his shoes as he slowly turned in a steady circle in the middle of the road. Small white crystals were beginning to fall around him once more. It was funny how in such dire situations, the world could still bring out the most beautiful things. Moments like these helped pull him back down to reality; and the reality was that there was no action he could take where she could stay in the picture. If he stayed, any lingering enemies of his might find her. Taking her with him out of the country was out of the question as well…he couldn't throw her into a life of constant running. That sort of life just wasn't for her. He had to wait until all the noise died down before settling anywhere. To do that, he had only one option. He had to leave her.

Red sighed, causing more wisps to swirl about him in a hazy dance. It really was beautiful out here. He would miss being home. Home was wherever she was. He adjusted his hat on his head and tugged on his coat lapels. With one last gaze around him, he started down the street.

* * *

**A/N: And on that note, we begin the hiatus! I'll get back to posting new drabbles when I can sprout out several more. Thank you all who have stuck by me with this story! Your reviews really do help me write more! Let me know what you guys thought of this one. I'll be taking PM's for the next few days for prompts. As always, a special thank you to Jackandsam! I could not have done this without you! **


	35. Watching You

_**Make This Go On Forever by Snow Patrol **_

* * *

**35\. Watching you**

_This splintered mast I'm holding on won't save me long_  
_Because I know fine well that what I did was wrong_

Ten years have come and gone since that fateful day when he last spoke to her. Red has gone no more than a hundred yards near her, and even when he does dare to approach her, she is completely oblivious to his presence. She can sense him, no doubt, of that he is sure

When he stands across the street from the small cafe she likes to frequent, he catches sight of her through the window, deep into her book with that quirk on her lips; so at ease with the world. A different person from the one she was slowly becoming in his company.

But his Lizzie is a smart girl. He disappears into the crowd when her gaze lifts from the words in front of her, directly to the spot that he was standing at only seconds before.

Red had kept his promise in more ways than one. He had loved her, albeit from a distance. But he had loved her nonetheless. Every fiber of his being screamed to be closer to her. This distance was what kept her safe and alive, fulfilling the other half of his promise to Samuel Milhoan.

Elizabeth Keen was a name known across the nation amongst all of the law enforcement agencies. She had appeared on several news broadcasts at the request of her superiors, building a fine facade of competence for the FBI. The CIA had consulted her on several cases that Blacklisters had been connected to in one way or another. She'd easily been able to shed light for them with her knowledge of the criminal mindset having worked with one of the best criminals in the world. Red had watched as her reputation flourished, making a name for her in the best possible way. Her dreams had come true. She was a successful agent; with only a slight tip of his hand she had managed to become famous, Lizzie had done the rest of the work herself.

All the same. He watched from a distance. She would put on a mask for the world, feigning happiness. Red could see the raging war within her. She was on the lookout for him. While walking down the street, she would look over her shoulder, feeling the tickle of prying eyes crawl down her spine. Her eyes scanned the crowds, trying to pull his face from somewhere amongst the hustle of rush hour.

For a long time, Red felt as if their time together was nothing but a dream. As if the eight years spent working together was nothing but a sick fantasy he played out in his mind. His mind had played many cruel tricks on him in the past, and he wouldn't have questioned whether this was just another one of those tricks. Had it not been for her brand on his neck and his cracked heart to remind him otherwise, he would have accepted that it was his mind at work, making up another story for him to tell.

_The final word in the final sentence you ever uttered to me was love_

_And I don't know where to look_  
_My words just break and melt_  
_Please, just save me from this darkness_

* * *

**A/N: The last two chapters have been switched to make the continuity of the rest of the story go smoothly. **


	36. Theater of War

**A/N: Follow up to 35. Watching You**

**_Little Lies by Ari Hest_**

* * *

**36\. Theater of War**

You_ need only say the word, and I'll come to you_

He lied…

That's all she can think of whenever he manages to wheedle himself into her mind. He manipulated her, made her think that he cared for her, and left her like a broken chess piece.

At least that's what she convinced herself of in order to keep moving on with her life.

The nightmares come and go most nights, but she can remember in the beginning when he first left how she would wake up screaming in the night, grasping for something to bring her back to reality. She couldn't count how many times she had woken up to find that she really wasn't on some far off Italian coast eating lunch with him. The countless times she had woken up screaming his name after seeing him get killed had taken its toll on her before long.

Slowly, she had distanced herself from her social circle of friends until she had none left. She didn't go out anymore. Instead she stayed at home, mourning his loss. She drifted through life without living.

All she had was her job and the broken memories that he had left her with. Its been years since she last set eyes on him or heard his voice. Each minute, each hour, each and every day she has needed him.

And he has never come.

* * *

**A/N: Hey everyone! I'm back with a few more drabbles! This one and the next four or five will be follow ups to chapter 35. Let me know what you guys think!**


	37. Expose the Nemesis

_** Here's that Rainy Day by Frank Sinatra**_

* * *

**37\. Expose the Nemesis**

_Here's that rainy day they told me about  
And I laughed at the thought  
That it might turn out this way_

In the ten years that he has been away from her, Red's enemies have all fallen. By taking down each of the whales on the list, the smaller more insignificant sharks have all disappeared. Many of them have simply decided to leave him be. Others have died. Then there are those who he paid off to buy their loyalty.

Yet he still keeps himself from going back to her. Even when he's a thousand miles away from her, he can still see that mischievous glint in her eye. Her sweet voice fills the silence in his head at night keeping him awake until the early hours of the morning.

Red finds fleeting moments of happiness when he begins seeing her in places she couldn't possibly be at. Down by the Florian cafe in Venice, he nearly breaks down in tears when he once again catches sight of her sitting next to the window. Slowly, she turns and gazes at him with the most serene look on her face. It takes all he has for him not to give in to the mirage of her presence.

Red carved his own chest open and tore his heart out the night he walked down that lonely road and left Washington. Since that night he's been dead inside. No coaxing from Mr. Kaplan or stern words from Dembe could bring him out of his blind stupor of misery. He thinks he might as well be dead. He has lost all will to move on. He can't do that; not without her by his side.

He doesn't laugh anymore. That boyish grin no longer graces his features. It's like he's forgotten how to be happy. He's free to move as he pleases without having a price on his head. He's a free man. Even that doesn't bring any comfort whatsoever. None of it is worth it without her.

His dreams consist only of her. Her hair. The way her body moved when she walked in front of him. The feel of her back beneath his palm. Her smell. It's like a broken film reel of what he once had.

Now all he does is sit and wait. In the villa, alone in the library with his scotch, at the park, in his room. He waits for death to come and whisk him away from this hell.

But he no longer wants to wait. He can't.

_Funny how love becomes a cold rainy day  
Funny that rainy day is here_

* * *

**A/N: Another one cuz I love y'all and I've been gone too long! Tell me what you think! Special shout out to my dear friend, JackandSam**


	38. Unnecessarily Complex

_**Dying Soul by Antonio Pinto **_

* * *

**38\. Unnecessarily Complex**

At first it's only the alcohol that gives any indication that something has changed.

He's drinks more than usual, even for his own standards. Most mornings Red wakes up to an empty bottle of cognac or whiskey that he had opened only the night before. As the months go by, the effects of the alcohol begin to lessen more and more. Dembe finally intervenes one evening when he walks in the middle of another one of Red's drinking binges.

"Care to join me m'friend?" Red asks with a half-lidded gaze. That's mostly all the effect it has on him now. To get him drowsy enough to sleep.

Dembe shakes his head. "Raymond, you must stop this nonsense. Otherwise, you'll never make it back to her."

Red laughs bitterly. "I was never meant to make it back to her."

Without another word, the tall bodyguard grabs the half empty bottle and disposes of it. After that night, Raymond never dares to let himself slip so far into the bottle again.

But all the same, her absence still takes its toll on him. He begins to lose weight until he finds himself at the same weight he was back in his navy days. Instead of drinking so much, he takes to diving off of cliffs into the ocean or into any pool that is available to swim in. Every once in a while he lets himself drift to the bottom of the pool or the seabed, trying to figure out whether he really wants to go back up. Each time, the thought of never seeing her brings him back up to the surface.

Still, sometimes death does seem more enticing than this hell he is going through.

Five years into his own disappearance from Washington, Red finds himself going half mad. He no longer goes to his business meetings. Instead he sends Dembe and Mr. Kaplan in his place. He doesn't want to deal with the world anymore. Not without her. He needs her like he needs air.

Red begins swimming in his clothes at midnight later on. Shoes, pants and dress shirt. He doesn't even bother removing his vest or eyeglasses. He just walks into the pool waist deep and lets himself drift along the large expanse on his back. He's fully aware of the fact that what he's doing is ludicrous; letting himself go so far.

"Get out," Dembe's deep voice tells him during one of these midnight swims just as Red's about to spot the constellation Sirius.

Red tilts his head slightly, feeling the water lap at his face and then catches sight of the dark brooding man with his arms folded over his chest.

He turns his listless gaze back to the dark sky.

"Get out Raymond, or I'll get you out myself."

Red huffs in amusement. He's sure that with his recklessly obsessive swimming and totalitarianism he's built enough muscle to take on his friend. He's thrown out of his musings when he finds himself beneath the water struggling for air. A large hand holds him firmly by the collar and then roughly pulls him out and shoves him onto the ground.

He coughs and sputters while on his hands and knees for several moments and peers blearily at the man glaring down at him.

"If you really want to see her again, you must first learn to live and feel again. She wouldn't want an empty man after all of this!"

Red considers Dembe's words and nods resolutely. "You're right."

"I know," Dembe replies. "Get ready. We fly to Washington tomorrow."

* * *

**A/N: Leave your thoughts, I'd love to hear them! Thanks to all of you who reviewed! **


	39. A Hymn to the Sea

Continuation of Chapters 35- 38

_**Take me To Church by Hozier**_

_The only heaven I'll be sent to  
Is when I'm alone with you—_

_I was born sick,_  
_But I love it_  
_Command me to be well_  
_Amen._

* * *

**39\. A Hymn to the Sea**

It was a pointless move. Why had he flown out here if he was going to stall?

She was still oblivious to the fact that he had been near her for the the past forty eight hours, yet he refused to go anywhere near her and insisted that he continue to maintain his distance for a while longer. He'd been ghosting through life without her. It was as if he had been in a silent trance; a meditation that he had been stuck in. One didn't simply snap out of a meditation after long period of time. A few hail Mary's had to be said first before stepping back into the world.

Thus on a Friday afternoon he found himself sitting in an empty church. The orange glow of the candlelight cast a glint across the wood around him. It gave off a sense of cleanliness that he hadn't felt in a very long time. A sense of purity. A part of him tried to latch on to that feeling as best he could given the circumstances.

He was here to accept his fate. He was doomed for hell, of that he was sure. There was still some hope. That small silver lining that God had sent him long ago. Or rather, the silver lining which he had forcefully grabbed and thrust into his line of sight to keep from straying away from the path he had set for her. The light had nearly gone out of that silver lining many a time. In death. Loss. And frustration. She had nearly succumbed to her darker nature because of him; that is until he had walked away from her on that cold December night.

Could he really barge back into her life and expect her to take him in with open arms? She had done so once, albeit reluctantly after the Garrick incident.

Mr. Kaplan and Dembe's reports had brought the exact same news month after month. She was safe and healthy but drifting through each day as well. Eventually it had come to the point where he could no longer bear to hear the news. He asked Dembe to bring no news at all unless her life was being threatened. Since his disappearance, no one had emerged to stir trouble. The criminal world knew to keep away from Red Reddington and his lady friend. He could bring them down and into a cell one hundred feet below with his connections in the FBI. Some people respected when a great criminal such as Red Reddington retired. Thus with all of his enemies either dead or in a box, he was a free man.

His spirit was still being kept prisoner though. She had the lock and key, and he needed it back. Without it, he was but a walking breathing body. Nothing else.

_Hail Mary full of grace-_

_Give me the serenity to tell what is right-_

_Lamb of god-_

_Deliver me from evil_

Red pressed his head against the smooth wood of the pew he was kneeling at. His prayers flitted though his mind in a jumbled mess.

A warm hand pressed against his shoulder. A familiar touch he had felt during his times of guidance as a young boy.

The voice broke the silence. "What does your heart tell you, Raymond?"

Red pressed his head against the pew and squeezed his eyes shut. "My heart wants her, Father," he replied in a hoarse voice. "Only her."

"God speaks to you."

"I cant pull her back into the life of monster, Father!"

Red lifted his head and gazed at the man.

With a sigh, the old priest took a seat beside him.

"Do you think he forgave that dying criminal next to him because he thought he was a monster?" He asked, motioning towards the wooden cross at the front with his head.

Red gave him no answer.

"He obviously saw something that was worth saving, Raymond. So do I. And I'm sure she will too."

Red remained kneeling and gazed up at the figure hanging on the cross. He clutched the crucifix in his hand.

"Go to her Raymond. Her heart calls for yours."

"I know," Red replied.

* * *

**A/N: What did you think? Leave a review! **Red and Lizzie's reunion is looming close! How will it go? ****

**Downton Abbey premiers today, and Fedora Monday is tomorrow! How awesome is that! If only I could finish my History essay. Let me know what you guys think of the songs if you listen to them as well! Special shout out to JackandSam! **


	40. Grace

_**Soul Inside by Antonio Pinto **_

* * *

**40\. Grace**

Liz hadn't expected to ever hear that quiet voice again. She remembered exchanging jokes with the kind, but mysterious voice once in a while. How long had it been since she had last heard it?

Dembe had disappeared along with Red, and thus the voice had gone as well. To say she was surprised at hearing it once more was an understatement. She nearly dropped the phone and burst out crying at the sound of her old friend.

She was even more taken aback at his gentle request for her to meet him at Saint Mathias Church on thirteenth street. Nevertheless, she had seized the chance of the possibility of seeing him once more.

His absence from her life had left a gaping hole that only he alone could fill. Perhaps this would help.

Dembe greeted her with a hug in front of the church Saturday morning. The sun was still peeking over the leafless trees, casting a purple glow across the sky.

"You look well, Liz." The tall man told her.

She smiled at his attempt to be courteous. They both knew she could do with a healthy light to her eyes.

"I've missed you," she told the man.

He nodded. "Me too," he paused a beat before adding, "So has he."

Liz gave him a strained smile. They both know the struggle she has been going through the last few years, trying to piece her life back together without him.

"He's been coming here for the last three days since we arrived. Always just walks around the grounds and then sits inside. Father Francis has been speaking to him in the evenings. No one comes during the week. It's just him alone with his thoughts. I thought it best to just call you." Dembe gazed out at the well-trimmed grass that extended out several acres behind the church. A neat line of trees bordered the start of the forest. From here one could get a clear look at the horizon.

"He doesn't know you're here."

They caught sight of a lone figure. She recognized the poised stance. His hands in his pockets gave away his unease. He had lost a lot of weight. Despite the chilly weather, he wore no coat. The black vest he wore stretched out across his broad shoulders, ending in a cut at his lean waist. He looked the same. Yet so different. Almost...dispirited.

A light fog surrounded him at his feet. If she didn't know any better, she would've guessed that she was gazing at the painting of a man pondering the sunrise.

With feet that felt like lead, she began to make her way towards him. It didn't feel as if she was getting any closer to him with each step she took. She half expected him to disappear as he has so many times in her dreams; but at some point she did get to him.

His back was to her still.

"Red?" she breathed out in a trembling voice.

* * *

**A/N: I know...I suck for ending it there. *evil grin***


	41. The Whisper of a Thrill

**A/N: The Pretty music really sets the mood! **

_**Inside the Cave by Antonio Pinto**_

_**Northbound Train by Martin Phipps **_

* * *

**41\. The Whisper of a Thrill**

He didn't care anymore. Not for appearance, not for anything. The top of his shirt was unbuttoned. He felt the damp fog against his skin. It's the first thing he can recall feeling aside from pain in years.

He'd finally lost it. He was hearing her voice now. He'd waited too long and his mind had decided to bring her to him Instead.

A smile quirked at his lips at the thought. He didn't mind so much. As long as the others didn't find out, it was fine by him. This way, he would never have to cope without her. The sun slowly added an orange tint to the gray and purple sky. It was a beautiful sight to behold with such a turmoil of emotions.

"Red?" He felt something move against his arm, and he looked down to see a hand gently tugging at the sleeve of his white shirt. He lifted his gaze and saw her watching him with a mixture of happiness and sorrow.

Good Lord, he was seeing things now. It's no different from his dreams. He can always hear her voice. Feel her touch. He just needs to wake up with his eyes full of tears.

But he wasn't waking up, and now she was moving to stand at his side. He could see her face more clearly now. Almost as if a fog within his mind was clearing up. A fog that had lingered there for as long as he had been without her. If it was finally lifting now, then it could only mean one thing.

He knows she'll disappear just as soon as he gets closer to her. She always does. He lifts his trembling hand up, and with quivering fingers reaches for her cheek, hoping to at least feel her before she fades away forever, leaving him with his illusions. But she smiles with watery eyes. And she's still there. Watching him.

Then he hears her again. "Red."

His serene smile began to disappear and his lips parted in disbelief. No. No. She's not real.

"Raymond."

No.

"Li...Lizzie?"

"It's me, Red."

"Lizzie?" He breathed in a lungful of air smelling the rain and fog before feeling his legs give way. He grabbed her hands and pressed them against his face squeezing his eyes shut. "Lizzie, is it really you?"

Her hands brushed against the side of his head and ran down the side of his face. "It's really me."

At her words, a cry escaped him, and he wrapped his arms around her, pressing his face against her. His body shook as his sobs overcame him. He hadn't cried like this since that Christmas Eve so long ago. She fell to her knees in front of him, and within seconds they were wrapped up in one another.

"I'm so sorry Lizzie. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me my darling."

His hands ran down her hair and across her face.

She smiled and pressed her head against his. "Red."

"I love you Lizzie. I love you."

He pressed his lips against her forehead and held her tightly without any intention of ever letting her ago again.

* * *

**A/N: How was it? :D**

**Happy Fedora Monday! WHOO!**


	42. Seeing Red

_**Stay by Rihanna **_

* * *

**42.****Seeing Red**

Liz liked to watch him in his sleep. All the worry and stress melted away from his face when he was deep in the throes of slumber. She leaned against her hand, peering over his broad shoulder at his smooth face. It was funny how time had not managed to catch up to that smooth skin of his. One would think that with all the smoking and drinking he did, that wrinkles would start peeking around his eyes. But no...she was almost jealous, and found herself hoping more than once that she would age as gracefully as he was.

Sleep didn't always come easy for Red. There was a time before they had moved in together when he would doze off beside her on the couch over a book he had been pursuing. Incoherent mumbles would suddenly meet her ears, and for a fleeting moment, she would think that someone had left the television on; that was until she'd remember that Red didn't keep a television in the Hempstead house.

With a wave of confusion, she would lift her gaze from the file she'd be reading and gaze at the man sprawled beside her. The pleading would begin, and soon after she'd place her hands on his shoulders. She never knew what it was he was pleading for. It could've been for her, for his wife, his daughter, or even for himself. All she could do was pull his head onto her lap and try to soothe him. He would never talk about the nightmares afterword. Only smile gently and press his lips against hers in silent thanks.

These incidents happened few and far between in the months since they had begun living together. She found that whenever he curled his body around hers, cocooning her with his presence, that the nightmares no longer visited him. Liz would find herself on top of him, pressed against his chest. Always with that small content smile on his lips, making him look so serene.

They were reaching the end of it all. Only three names were left on the list. Number one had been taken down two years ago after Red had been taken captive for six weeks. At the end of the whole ordeal, he had been reduced to a quivering, shell shocked man, contrary to the one he was meant to be. For months afterword, he sat outside on the terrace of his villa, reliving the hours of torture he had endured for the simple fact that he would not sell out Lizzie and her team of G-men. For her...

How long had it taken for her to bring him out of the shell that his own body, mind and soul had become? To calm the terror filled screams that would rip across the night?

She couldn't say how long it took the sooth that singed heart of his. All that mattered, was that she now had the man behind the mask.

* * *

**A/N: So-I know I suck...but the good news is you guys get the last few chapters in one update!**


	43. The Veil

_**I hate you then I love You by Celine Dion**_

_**Heart of Life by John Mayer**_

* * *

**43\. The Veil **

The light from inside cast a dull yellow glow across the grass. Red stood in front of the hedge amongst the shadows that the cypress tree provided. Out here, she would never be able to see him. That was how he had to stay: invisible to the bride's eye, but that remained to be seen; his heart had other desires.

"Tell me, what type of a man allows the woman he loves to escape right in front of his eyes like this?"

Red didn't turn at the sound of the red head's voice. Instead, he kept his eyes locked on the sight before him through the French doors.

The bridesmaids surrounded her with bubbly grins, adjusting the veil on her head. One of them smacked her hand away playfully as she tried to grab a handful of popcorn. A perfect girl's night in on the night before the wedding. She wasn't one to go for a bachelorette party, she was a simple person.

The sound of chirping crickets drew him from his thoughts. He worked his lip between his teeth.

"The type of man who is undeserving of her and knows when to step aside," he said in a gravelly tone.

Ressler's scoff disturbed the night as he walked around in front of Red into his line of vision, blocking his view of the view inside.

"We both know that's a load of bull."

Red felt his cheek pull up at the agents words. He let his mask come over him like water running down his face.

"Be that as it may, Donald, there's nothing that can be done about it now. This time tomorrow, she'll be far out of my reach."

Ressler gave him a hard look. "But that point still hasn't come. Now is your chance."

Red stared right back at him with a neutral face.

"What you deserve shouldn't come into play right now, Red. Not if you really love her. What matters is that she deserves to know."

Red glanced over the red head's shoulder into the room. She seemed happy, but distracted. How he longed to know what was on her mind.

"I'm going to go in. Get the ladies out for a while. This is your chance."

He disappeared into the darkness leaving Red alone once more. This was beyond wrong. He shouldn't be here. She was going to live a happy life. A life free of the demons he kept hidden in his walk-in closet. He should just turn around and leave.

His musings died when he saw the door open and watched as Ressler cheerfully came up with some excuse to get all of the girls, save Lizzie, to step out of the room. Evidently it worked, because a minute later he was gazing at her as her body all but deflated. She stared at her reflection in the mirror she was sitting in front of with a frown.

Red finally gave in and stepped out of his spot beside the tree. He walked across the damp lawn and swiftly opened the French door before letting it slam shut behind him. She startled in her seat.

"Jesus, Red! You scared me half to death!" She stood up and glared at him. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Hello Lizzie." He worked his lip nervously. For once in his life, he was at a loss for what to say.

"What do you want?"

She squirmed under his intense scrutiny.

"You'll never be happy with him," he told her, "Not the way you would be with me."

She watched him, awestruck.

He held his palm out to her, "Come with me."

With trembling fingers, Lizzie grasped his hand.

* * *

**A/N: So this was written for a prompt I was sent on tumblr, so whoever sent it, thank you for that! Hope you liked it. **


	44. At Every Opportunity

_**Hooked on a Feeling by Blue Suede**_

_**Time of the Season by Phillip Phillips **_

* * *

**44\. At Every Opportunity**

Red was sprawled across Ressler's chair with his shoes on top of the man's desk. He'd been close to swiping all of the clutter into the wastebasket just to irritate him; one look from Lizzie had made him reconsider. Instead, he sat there making sure to leave shoe marks all over the paperwork. He was bored and trying his best not to skulk.

Lizzie had called him out more than once for pouting and skulking like an adolescent. Red had staunchly argued against this, despite being fully aware that she was right. He did enjoy a good skulk. All he wanted was for her to look up from her dull report and give him her full attention.

What was so bad about that?

A sigh escaped his lips as he began fiddling with the drawstring on the blinds. The corner of his lips quirked up and he gazed at her from the corner of his eye. He grabbed hold of the rod and twisted it, opening the blinds to reveal the Hives bull pen.

Red peered at the agents who were hustling about working like ants for a brief moment before shutting the blinds again with a _flick_.

He looked at her again. Either she hadn't heard the petty disturbance, or she was just choosing to pay him no mind. Red thought it was the latter.

No matter.

_Flick_

Light streamed into the office.

She continued scribbling away at the report.

_Flick_

Darkness. Still. She didn't look up.

_Flick_.

_Flick_

_Flick_

Nothing

_Flick flick flick flick_

"Damn it, Red!" She burst out.

Finally!

"Yes Lizzie?" He quipped innocently.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Stop."

Red grinned at her. "Stop what?"

He ran his finger over the rod.

_Flick _

Liz leaned over her desk and reached for her stress ball flinging it straight at his head.

It hit him with a dull thud.

Success!

"Would you like to play, Lizzie?"

"No!"

With deft fingers, he picked up the orange ball from where it had landed on his lap.

"Come on Lizzie!" He whined pathetically. "You've been slaving over that horrid report for over an hour, we've not spent any time together since I got back from the Netherlands last week and there's this little Italian restaurant I've been wanting to take you to."

Liz shot an irritated glance at him. She sighed.

"Red-"

"Come on!"

"I can-"

"Say yes."

"I have to-"

_Flick_

She stopped abruptly. When he didn't make any other movement she started again.

"I can't just leav-"

_Flick...flick flick flick flick_

"Alright! Alright!" She got up and snatched her coat from the coat rack.

Red grinned widely at her. "Excellent."

* * *

**A/N: Perhaps a bit anti-climatic, but there it is-the end of the collection. Thank you all so much for the love and support that you sent! It's been awesome knowing that my words do resonate with a lot of you despite it not being the best work out there. But you've gotta admit, 'Hooked on a Feeling' is a great way to end a Blacklist fic! Who wants to start placing bets as to whether or not they'll use the song at some point? *throws money in the air***


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